“He will have no fear of bad news; his heart is steadfast, trusting in the LORD.” (Psalms 112:7)
No fear of bad news…Does that describe you?
I realized just recently that the Lord is not ready to put my picture next to that verse. And while there are occasions when I do respond to bad news with a steadfast heart that trusts the Lord, there are more times when I am frightened by the bad news that comes my way.
Ironically, this particular crisis of faith didn’t come from bad news that came my way. It came from bad news that a friend of mine recently faced.
She had been feeling rotten lately, but thought that all of the chronic exhaustion and aches were nothing more than a function of getting older. Tired of feeling tired, she consulted a physician, who told her after an examination, an x-ray, and a CAT scan that he was 99% sure she had cancer.
I couldn’t tell you how many people were praying for her, but I know there were a lot of Christians asking the Lord to respond in a big way. And God didn’t disappoint us with his answer. He took a 99% chance of cancer and showed what he can do with the 1% that we left him because the battery of tests that were ordered, along with a biopsy, didn’t reveal cancer, just a nagging infection that a cocktail of strong drugs will eventually take care of. She’s going to be fine.
The surprise that has come from her experience is not how much it has changed her. She is understandably closer to the Lord and continues to praise him for his goodness and mercy. The surprise is how it’s changing me.
My walk with the Lord is not where I thought it was. I am ashamed to admit that her brush with the notion of dying made me wonder, “Is there really a heaven?”
Roger Bennett, pianist for The Cathedrals, recently shared a similar crisis of faith when he was diagnosed with leukemia. “I don’t remember a whole lot about that day,” he told a group of close friends, “but I do remember thinking about me on my death bed, wondering when I finally closed my eyes whether I would drift off into oblivion, or open my eyes and see New Jerusalem.”
I had hoped my faith would be stronger after eight years of calling myself a Christian. And while I’ve made great strides in a lot of areas, I am not yet where I need to be. I think I know why.
For starters, my prayer life is out of shape. I’ve allowed Satan to confuse me about prayer. He’s told me that it doesn’t work and he’s been planting those doubts to distract me from one of the most pivotal tools in a Christian relationship. I’m going to take back what the enemy stole from me.
I’ll tell you something else that I’ve realized. I haven’t been listening to God as closely as I should. Oh I’ve been reading the Bible, but mainly to help me write this column and prepare my weekly Sunday School lesson. What I haven’t been doing is spending enough time in his word to hear what he might be trying to say just to me. I’m going to do something about that, too!
I looked at myself through my friend’s scare and I didn’t like what I saw. I haven’t been working as hard at my relationship with Jesus as he’s been working at his relationship with me. But I’m no longer afraid. Victory is at hand!
Share on Facebook